Jeff Bezos: No Thank You, Mr. Pecker.

Amazon.com founder and Washington Post owner Jeff Bezos was investigating how The National Enquirer got ahold of the steamy text messages he sent to his mistress. The National Enquirer, you might imagine, wasn’t keen on that:

Something unusual happened to me yesterday. Actually, for me it wasn’t just unusual — it was a first. I was made an offer I couldn’t refuse. Or at least that’s what the top people at the National Enquirer thought. I’m glad they thought that, because it emboldened them to put it all in writing. Rather than capitulate to extortion and blackmail, I’ve decided to publish exactly what they sent me, despite the personal cost and embarrassment they threaten.

Good on Bezos for standing up to these buckets of slime posing as humans at The National Enquirer, but woe be unto us, the rest of humanity, as the likelihood that we’re going to see Bezos’s Bits has increased 700%.


Ya Damn Right

In 11th grade, we had to make a video based on a poem for my A.P. English class. At the request of my teacher, I did two — the one she wanted was a overly-serious (and totally misunderstanding of the point of the poem) video for Robert Frost’s “The Road Less Traveled”, and the one I wanted to do was a reading of the Shaft theme.

This is all to say that I can’t wait for this movie, and I will 100% be there several times opening weekend.

Avengers: Endgame Trailer #1

It’s cool if we can rush ahead to April 2019 now, I’m fine with that.

I love this trailer, but I hate the title, which is Marvel’s own damn fault — don’t keep the name of the movie a secret and overhype it if you’re just going to go with what everyone’s first guess was, you ninnies.

In fact, here’s a few titles I would have liked them to go with instead:

  1. Avengers: Assemble
  2. Avengers: Captain Marvel’s Gonna Be Pissed
  3. Avengers: Good of You to Finally Show Up, Hawkeye Ronin
  4. Avengers: Probably the Last One Before the X-Men Start Ruining Things, Ugh
  5. Avengers v Thanos: Dawn of Justice